Have rediscovered some old tunes and came across Bright Eyes.

And now I just see you dying over and over again.
I see you looking at me through the incubator wall, searching for relief.
I hear your screams as they sought for veins.
I see your mouth after they removed the ventilator. Forced open, throat bulging unnaturally.
Your poor tummy bloated and black.
I hear the alarm as you arrested the second time.
I see the doctors running. A swarm around you.
I see your skin so pink then like a mottled red web then ice white.

I don't want to remember but I don't want to forget. There will be no new memories to replace these.